“There are so many former versions of myself that I barely recognize now. The teenager, the girl learning to become a woman, the one who had yet to experience the love for a child; they are versions of myself that I vividly remember but feel so far removed from now. But the version I never expected to meet and couldn’t have dreamed of looking back on with a new perspective, was the woman I was, wrecked with grief and in complete despair… the one standing by the coffin of her son, tightly hugging his blanket, wondering how this could possibly be real. The woman who had innocence ripped from her life through the death of her 3-month-old baby boy. This is a woman that didn’t believe life could ever be okay again, one that didn’t want it to be. I didn’t think there would ever be a version of myself that could laugh again. A version that could smile when thinking of his perfect face instead of falling apart. A version that could desperately love him and miss him with every beat of her heart but continue to see the beauty in this life.”
(Excerpt above from THIS ARTICLE written by another client and dear friend of mine, Angela for the On Coming Alive Project. You can learn more about the mission and manifesto behind the project, here.)
I’ve watched Angela and Daniel’s family grow since the very beginnings of my business. Quite literally, she was one of my very first clients and one of only a handful that I can say has seen (and stuck with) my growth as much as I’ve seen hers. I’ve photographed them since their first baby girl Elliana was in Angela’s belly. That seems like an eternity ago. In retrospect, I guess it was. Now awaiting their third sweet babe, their rainbow baby, Isaiah, I’ve never been filled with quite so much emotion in watching the evolution of a family through my lens.
You may remember perfect Noah’s newborn session from a couple of years ago. Perfection is every bit of what that little flirty blue-eyed boy is. Noah gained his angel wings at 3 months old, but he is so so SO far from forgotten. He’s so very much alive in the hearts and minds of everyone who surrounds Angela, Daniel, Elli, and soon-to-be Isaiah.
Angela has the eyes and heart of a giver and her personality shines SO radiantly. Seeing the genuine smiles on their faces as we played in the sand, and as Elli whispered to her mama how much she loved her, and how she spoke of BOTH of her brothers that day just filled my heart.
I had several photos from that day that I genuinely love, but this one below is absolutely one of my favorites. Angela with that big smile and all of her babies present, in one way or another.
Angela, Daniel, and Elli released the big white balloon with butterflies trailing behind it at the end of the session just for Noah–and Elli sent it off all while blowing him the biggest kiss.
Angela and Daniel, there are no words to accurately describe the genuine love I feel for having gotten to document so many raw moments for your family. It’s a heartwarming reminder of this crazy, beautiful life we live. I cannot wait to meet Isaiah.